GONYLIN
08-25-2011, 03:30 PM
<p><p >Just to fill you in why there may be a bit of a delay.<span> </span>Having tried to consult with our Customer Liaison Team (nope we couldn’t find them either) I am sure you are as elated as we are that we decided (on a whim) that we would “GO GREEN” with the launch of GU61 for the European servers.<span> </span>What this means is that we have painstakingly patched together any parts from the US servers that weren’t too broken and Colin (our Mexican janitor who does a bit of programming over the weekends) has bodged them together in his back shed just for you.<span> </span>We haven’t of course had time to test it, as health and safety laws here in the US are pretty stringent, but it will be a nice surprise for us all if it does work as it will be a first!</p> <p >Anyways; going along with the Green theme, which we know from Colin thta you lily livered, liberals from Euro Disney love, (<em>he stands in for the European Marketing Manager occasionally – very useful chap Colin – and cheap!</em>) we looked at the cheapest most environmentally friendly way to get this lovely bit of recycled software to you.<span> </span>Having consulted our Sustainable Economic Development Executive (errr that would be Colin too) we found that loading the patch on an old cassette tape and sending it on a raft of used coconut shells and then floating them over to you would be the best option for all concerned.<span> </span>You will also be pleased to know that the craft will be personally manned by our own Overseas Logistics Director who has considerable experience in these operations – Captain R. Crusoe (Colin’s not so bright cousin from Alabama).<span> </span>We threw him into the ocean off the West Coast with GU 61 along with his trusty raft only an hour ago so he should be arriving on your fair shores ….. well your guess is as good as mine!<span> </span>If he makes it and you happen to find him washed up near you can you please give him the bus fair to Amsterdam which we will be more than happy to redeem to you in the form of Station Cash!!<span> </span>Aren’t we nice?</p> <p >Hope that nicely shuts you whingers wraps everything up.<span> </span>I think you will all now agree what a wonderful job we have all done to once again to polish the gleaming reputation of $ONY worldwide and the care it shows to its European customers.<span> </span>Much thanks of course to Colin, who as a result of his sterling efforts you will be pleased to hear we have promoted to Head of Corporate Security – which must be a relief all round!</p> <p >Thanks again for all your kind comments which I will pass on to our Chairman (Colin’s Mum).</p> <p >Yours Sincerely</p> <p >Errrr Colin<span style="font-family: Wingdings; mso-ascii-font-family: Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family: Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font: minor-latin; mso-char-type: symbol; mso-symbol-font-family: Wingdings;"><span>J</span></span></p> <p >Ps. Our Sales and Accounts Department are mindful that you will be very disappointed not to be able to purchase any of our exclusive items from the Market Place until we are back up and live – yes I can see that would be highly disappointing. As a further service to yourselves during these worrying times I have therefore personally arranged so that you can send cheques, postal orders, cash or share certificates directly to me.<span> </span>Colin has asked however that these should be made out to Colin’s Mum for tax security reasons in the light of recent events.</p></p>