Game Update #44: Island of the Patch People

[GPA_Coyote]

<p>That's right! It's that time again.</p><p>The development team and programmers and coders and other unsung soldiers of the gaming world have worked long and hard on the next series of patches. Their work, their effort, their blood and tears....</p><p> ...are now free to be openly mocked as two lazy pasty gamer geeks sit back and review the latest bout of patch notes while making more than one reference to the word poo.</p><p>We proudly bring you <a href="http://eq2.tentonhammer.com/index.php?module=ContentExpress&func=display&ceid=1325" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">GU#44: Island of the Patch People</a> </p><p>And what would any good island in the middle of nowhere be without PIRATES?!? No good what-so-ever, so check out the latest edition of Avast Ye for all your <a href="http://drunkduck.com/Avast_Ye/index.php" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Pirate Comic Goodness. </a></p><p>And on a more self serving note, you can check out my daily ramblings at the lovingly inspired by the most often comment ever uttered to me..</p><p><a href="http://coyote.blogs.tentonhammer.com" rel="nofollow" target="_blank">Not Funny...Ever</a></p><p>Enjoy!</p>

[Kiara-]

<p><b>Coyote:</b> Sure, but his real name was Marion, which is a chick's name, which means...</p><p><b>RadarX:</b> He can't quit you.</p><p><b>Coyote:</b> Bingo. </p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">I love you both in unnatural and likely illegal ways for this bit...  That part put me over the edge from snickering quietly to having tears I was laughing so hard.</span></p>

[Domino]

Sometimes when I write a simple patch note I wonder to myself what RadarX and Coyote are going to make of it, and how they could possibly find a way to make fun of it.<b>Deputy Hopple in the Enchanted Lands is no longer trying to take twice as many apple muffins as he had asked for.</b>And yet ... I am always completely surprised by the directions their minds can go in ... <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/385970365b8ed7503b4294502a458efa.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />

[Kiara-]

<p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">You're honestly still surprised by anything they can cook up?</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">Really?  And you've known them how long now?</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">* takes away Domino's JumJum *  you need to lay off the sauce, sugar.</span></p>

[Domino]

<cite>Kiara wrote:</cite><blockquote><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">You're honestly still surprised by anything they can cook up?</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">Really?  And you've known them how long now?</span></p></blockquote>I've actually only had the chance to talk to Coyote in person.  RadarX totally snubbed me at the fan faire pool party.  I was, like, "Hi!  You're RadarX!  I love reading your stuff!" and he was like, "uh, hi", and totally turned his back on me and went back to talking to his guild.  <img src="http://forums.vogue.com.au/images/smilies/newsmiles/heartbreak.gif" border="0" alt="" />  Sigh ... I have this effect on men, story of my life!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/8a80c6485cd926be453217d59a84a888.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />Still, the Ten Ton Hammer patch note previews are always the highlight of a game update for me.  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img src="/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" />" />

[Kiara-]

<p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">Radar is shy... all that hype about his sexy southern drawl makes him nervous * nod *</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">I'll smack him for you.  What a meanie... I can't believe he snubbed you!</span></p>

[SenorPhrog]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>Kiara wrote:</cite><blockquote><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">You're honestly still surprised by anything they can cook up?</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">Really?  And you've known them how long now?</span></p></blockquote>I've actually only had the chance to talk to Coyote in person.  RadarX totally snubbed me at the fan faire pool party.  I was, like, "Hi!  You're RadarX!  I love reading your stuff!" and he was like, "uh, hi", and totally turned his back on me and went back to talking to his guild.  <img src="http://forums.vogue.com.au/images/smilies/newsmiles/heartbreak.gif" border="0" alt="" />  Sigh ... I have this effect on men, story of my life!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/8a80c6485cd926be453217d59a84a888.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />Still, the Ten Ton Hammer patch note previews are always the highlight of a game update for me.  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img mce_tsrc=" />" /></blockquote>Lol... I honestly don't remember that.  That whole trip was blur.  In fairness we have a rule at events like those.  Coyote has delegated me to do all the plotting, evil scheme design, and foil assassination attempts.  I'm usually not allowed to talk, but I will make it a point at the next event I see you at to say hello. 

[Marillion]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>Kiara wrote:</cite><blockquote><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">You're honestly still surprised by anything they can cook up?</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">Really?  And you've known them how long now?</span></p></blockquote>I've actually only had the chance to talk to Coyote in person.  RadarX totally snubbed me at the fan faire pool party.  I was, like, "Hi!  You're RadarX!  I love reading your stuff!" and he was like, "uh, hi", and totally turned his back on me and went back to talking to his guild.  <img src="http://forums.vogue.com.au/images/smilies/newsmiles/heartbreak.gif" border="0" alt="" />  Sigh ... I have this effect on men, story of my life!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/8a80c6485cd926be453217d59a84a888.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />Still, the Ten Ton Hammer patch note previews are always the highlight of a game update for me.  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img mce_tsrc=" />" /></blockquote>Domino, i feel for you at the next FanFaire. His mind is probably already planning some truly demented things to engage you with this time.<i>......, oh i'm just a regular dirge ..... nothing to see here.</i>

[Spyderbite]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite></cite><img src="http://forums.vogue.com.au/images/smilies/newsmiles/heartbreak.gif" border="0" alt="" />  Sigh ... I have this effect on men, story of my life!</blockquote>Yet there are Ratongas that swoooonnn... go figure. :/Good stuff Radar and Coyote.. as usual! <img src="/smilies/3b63d1616c5dfcf29f8a7a031aaa7cad.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" />

[SG_01]

<cite>wDominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>Kiara wrote:</cite><blockquote><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">You're honestly still surprised by anything they can cook up?</span></p><p><span style="color: #cc99ff;">Really?  And you've known them how long now?</span></p></blockquote>I've actually only had the chance to talk to Coyote in person.  RadarX totally snubbed me at the fan faire pool party.  I was, like, "Hi!  You're RadarX!  I love reading your stuff!" and he was like, "uh, hi", and totally turned his back on me and went back to talking to his guild.  <img src="http://forums.vogue.com.au/images/smilies/newsmiles/heartbreak.gif" border="0" alt="" width="16" height="14" />  Sigh ... I have this effect on men, story of my life!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/8a80c6485cd926be453217d59a84a888.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />Still, the Ten Ton Hammer patch note previews are always the highlight of a game update for me.  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img src=" width="15" height="15" />"></blockquote>Aww, poor girl. Perhaps though, that's just an effect on married and/or American men.

[Vortexelemental]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote>Sometimes when I write a simple patch note I wonder to myself what RadarX and Coyote are going to make of it, and how they could possibly find a way to make fun of it.<b>Deputy Hopple in the Enchanted Lands is no longer trying to take twice as many apple muffins as he had asked for.</b>And yet ... I am always completely surprised by the directions their minds can go in ... <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/385970365b8ed7503b4294502a458efa.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" /></blockquote>Well, atleast you can thank me for giving you the bug to write the note on =p

[Domino]

<cite>Vortexelemental@The Bazaar wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><b>Deputy Hopple in the Enchanted Lands is no longer trying to take twice as many apple muffins as he had asked for.</b></blockquote>Well, atleast you can thank me for giving you the bug to write the note on =p</blockquote>We don't usually see who the bug was submitted by, once the /bug report has filtered through QA and been translated into our bug queues ... but thank you in that case!  <img src="/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" />  Which goes for everybody who submits helpful bugs of course!  We need more good base material for RadarX and Coyote's writeups after all!  <img src="/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" />

[Vortexelemental]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>Vortexelemental@The Bazaar wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><b>Deputy Hopple in the Enchanted Lands is no longer trying to take twice as many apple muffins as he had asked for.</b></blockquote>Well, atleast you can thank me for giving you the bug to write the note on =p</blockquote>We don't usually see who the bug was submitted by, once the /bug report has filtered through QA and been translated into our bug queues ... but thank you in that case!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img mce_tsrc=" />" />  Which goes for everybody who submits helpful bugs of course!  We need more good base material for RadarX and Coyote's writeups after all!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img mce_tsrc=" />" /></blockquote>Well, i actually talked to you about that quest on test, but i also sent the bug report in too, so /shrug =p

[Domino]

<cite>Vortexelemental@The Bazaar wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite></cite>Well, i actually talked to you about that quest on test, but i also sent the bug report in too, so /shrug =p</blockquote>*scatterbrained*So many names and bugs have crossed my desk between then and now, I didn't link your forum name to your character ... what can I say ... I guess I should have been a blonde elf ... <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/499fd50bc713bfcdf2ab5a23c00c2d62.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />   Sorry!  But thank you again!  <img src="/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" />

[Vortexelemental]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite>Vortexelemental@The Bazaar wrote:</cite><blockquote><cite></cite>Well, i actually talked to you about that quest on test, but i also sent the bug report in too, so /shrug =p</blockquote>*scatterbrained*So many names and bugs have crossed my desk between then and now, I didn't link your forum name to your character ... what can I say ... I guess I should have been a blonde elf ... <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/499fd50bc713bfcdf2ab5a23c00c2d62.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" />   Sorry!  But thank you again!  <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY<img src="/smilies/283a16da79f3aa23fe1025c96295f04f.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" />" /></blockquote>Ha, thats fine, i was probably on an alt anyways, i would be surprised if you remembered me at all anyway =p

[PonderStibbons]

<cite>DominoDev wrote:</cite><blockquote>Sometimes when I write a simple patch note I wonder to myself what RadarX and Coyote are going to make of it, and how they could possibly find a way to make fun of it.<b>Deputy Hopple in the Enchanted Lands is no longer trying to take twice as many apple muffins as he had asked for.</b>And yet ... <b><i>I am always completely surprised by the directions their minds can go in ..</i></b>. <img src="/eq2/images/smilies/385970365b8ed7503b4294502a458efa.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" /></blockquote>Domino... it's Coy and Radar.  There's only one direction their minds CAN go in.OK, fairs fair, it's Coy really. Radar's just dragged along screaming most times.I read, just the other day, that Stephen Hawkings abandoned research into black holes and is now trying to fathom just how low Coy will go.(And look at the state it's left him in!)

[Aeralik]

I'd have to agree with domino that I always love reading your take on the notes especially since I always get ripped apart.This one cracks me up though: <p><span style="font-size: small;font-family: times new roman,times;" class="pn-content-page-body"><b>Combat text will now display if you double attack, flurry, ranged double attack etc.</b></span></p> <p><span style="font-size: small;font-family: times new roman,times;" class="pn-content-page-body"><span style="color: #008000;"><b>RadarX:</b></span> So parsers will now more correctly read DPS? Awesome. Gentlemen! Start your epeens!</span></p> <p><span style="font-size: small;font-family: times new roman,times;" class="pn-content-page-body"><span style="color: #0000ff;"><b>Coyote:</b></span> Oh. It is started baby. Started BIG time. Mmmm. Would you parse me? I'd parse me. I'd parse me HARD...</span></p><p>Thats not quite the effect I was going for but I did figure some people would love to brag about how much damage comes from double attack or ranged DA.</p>

[44Dragon]

<cite>Aeralik wrote:</cite><blockquote>I'd have to agree with domino that I always love reading your take on the notes especially since I always get ripped apart.This one cracks me up though:<p><span style="font-size: small;font-family: times new roman,times;" class="pn-content-page-body"><b>Combat text will now display if you double attack, flurry, ranged double attack etc.</b></span></p><p><span style="font-size: small;font-family: times new roman,times;" class="pn-content-page-body"><span style="color: #008000;"><b>RadarX:</b></span> So parsers will now more correctly read DPS? Awesome. Gentlemen! Start your epeens!</span></p><p><span style="font-size: small;font-family: times new roman,times;" class="pn-content-page-body"><span style="color: #0000ff;"><b>Coyote:</b></span> Oh. It is started baby. Started BIG time. Mmmm. Would you parse me? I'd parse me. I'd parse me HARD...</span></p><p>Thats not quite the effect I was going for but I did figure some people would love to brag about how much damage comes from double attack or ranged DA.</p></blockquote><p><img src="http://forums.station.sony.com/eq2/images/smilies/69934afc394145350659cd7add244ca9.gif" border="0" alt="SMILEY" width="15" height="15" /> You might as well go ahead and have "Parse you" added to the list for the naughty word bot.</p><p>...I parse you...</p>