SilkenMaid
04-22-2006, 03:15 AM
<DIV><FONT color=#ffff00>A Typical day at the SOE office...</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff00></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff00>***********************************</FONT></DIV> <DIV><BR><FONT color=#66ffff>Moorgard: "I want to order Pizza!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ff0099>Blackguard: "I want Chinese!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#66ffff>Moorgard: "You had Chinese yesterday its my turn to order!!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ff0099>Blackguard: "Tough! I am No.1 see my voting record in forums. I can do what I like!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#66ffff>Moorgard: "That was rigged!!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ff0099>Blackguard: "No it wasn't it was my legions of followers and fans who voted for ME!!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(Its 5am in the morning and still dark, Owlichick and Higby are pulling up in the carpark at SOE's headquarters..)</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#66ffff>Moorgard: "Was not, you set it up!" (The now irate little gnome stomps his foot, glaring up at the 8 foot tall Barbarian) </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ff0099>Blackguard: "Now why would I do something like that? My legions of admirers have spoken and you are simply jealous!"</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#66ffff>Moorgard: "You..you..you..YOU!" (Frustrated now, he reaches down and removes a slipper off of his foot and hurls it at the large barbarians face.)</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(The barbarian just smiles and ducks out of the way..grinning and infuriating the small gnome more. Moorgard throws his other slipper at the grinning face..exposing his big toe sticking out of his red and purple stockinged foot)</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(Blackguard just laughs and turns to where his coffee mug sits on his desk..not noticing the small angry gnome picking up a heavy marble pencil holder on his desk..and tossing it at the side of the barbarians smug grinning face in one easy movement.)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(The huge barbarian goes crashing to the floor, the pencil holder deflected in its flight flies into the nearby central server controls where a sudden flash of light erupts, followed closely by a small explosion and LOTS and LOTS of smoke.)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(Outside, Higby and Owlchick are gathering their gear from their vehicles when suddenly everything blacks out, followed closely by a crash. Owlchick, unlocks her car door using its remote control and hits the high beam headlight switch)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(Higby quickly steps aside as a giant barbarian with a rather irate red faced gnome latched around his head, arms locked in place and both covered in shattered glass from the door they had both just gone through at the front of the building, run past him)</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#66cc00><FONT color=#66ff33>Higby looks at OwlChick and says simply: "Same old excuse for the boss?"</FONT> </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(Owlchick nods and pulls out her mobile/cell phone and sends a quick SMS to the SOE management. "PSSBL SRVR REPL8SMNT NEEDED! UN4SEEN MRGNCY!"...Both look at each other and shrug before heading inside, stepping over the remains of the front door at SOE's headquarters and into the darkness to survey the damage, knowing it is going to be just another typical day at SOE.)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ff99ff>Owlchick (Tiredly): You know the Djinn's are threatening strike action over those two, they are tired of cleaning up their mess.</FONT></DIV> <DIV><BR><FONT color=#66ff33>Higby: I will talk to Djinn's later and soothe over their hurt feelings as best I can. At least management had the foresight to lock away the 'Gods Weapons' though unintentionally admittedly from Moorgards and Blackguards reach. Remember how Norrath used to be just the one land mass, was so nice then, who was to know that a disagreement over an iced tea bun between those two, would result in the mess it is today!!</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#66cc66></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ff99ff>Owlchick (places her hand over Higby's mouth quickly): Shhh!! No one is supposed to know that and these walls have ears! We have spent countless hours redoing the lore over that just so the citizens of Norrath and especially management never discovered the REAL truth! </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>(Both look around tensely for a moment, then relax as they realise for the moment at least, they are alone..)</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>MEANWHILE: High up in the lofty spires of SOE's coporate headquarters, a rather large Djinn watches the proceedings through a large crystal ball, to one side a smaller Djinn sits at a desk typing in figures on a small calculator and tabulating the results.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn (shaking his head): I simply don't know what to do about those two?</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: Who Sir, Moorgard and Blackguard?</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn: Who else would I be talking about? Those two have singlehandedly given me more grey hairs and wrinkles then everyone else combined!</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: Well, You could send them to Everfrost, to one of the ice caves or to the Tundra to cool down for a time Sir?</FONT></DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc></FONT> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn: Tried that already, now I have many of the giants trying to claim compensation for counselling! Blubbering, crying and stressed out giants at my door I don't need again! </FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: Umm ok sir I see your point Sir. Have you thought about sending them to Varsoon's Dungeons for a spell? Seperate cells of course.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn: I did that already, but the undead complained about the noise?</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: The undead can hear Sir?</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn: Ever heard the expression 'Waking the dead' Apparently it's not just an expression where those two are concerned! So I was given the choice of them all moving into my office if I kept those two in Varsoon's cells. To be honest, I had to give that idea considerable thought until the undead also said they wanted houses in Qeynos and Freeport. Our budget simply would NOT allow it. (He sighs remorsefully at this point)</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: I have just had a thought Sir?</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn: Yes what is it my measly minion?</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: What if we offered them to Microsoft to work on Vanguard! It would set them back years Sir!</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#cc3300>Larger Djinn (A broad smile across his face): You are looking good for that promotion my small minion, that is a splendid idea! All I would have to tell those two is how there is an unlimited supply of iced tea buns over there and they would jump at the oppertunity. A brilliant idea indeed!</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ccffcc>Smaller Djinn: Thankyou Mr.Smedly.</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><FONT color=#ffff66>Authors note: Is this real or is this surreal? Make up your own mind! :womanwink:</FONT></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><EM><STRONG><FONT color=#ff99ff>* Silkwind - Runneye *</FONT></STRONG></EM></DIV> <DIV><EM><FONT face=Garamond color=#ff66ff>{Suffering from...</FONT></EM></DIV> <DIV><EM><FONT face=Garamond color=#ff66ff>Signature clueless}</FONT></EM></DIV> <DIV> </DIV> <DIV><BR> </DIV>